In my younger years, I hoped relentlessly that my parents would win the lottery. Outside of the obvious of being straight up filthy rich, why did I hope they won the lottery? Specifically, I wanted my own arcade room, maybe a four wheeler or two, and some really expensive cars. Yeah, at 15/16 years old I was pretty shallow like every other teenager.

Post desiring a bunch of video games and expensive things that go fast, I hoped that I would fall into some huge sum of cash so that I could buy property and travel. Slightly more sophisticated but still materialistic.

As of recently, my only hope is that I somehow get the chance to ask sarah palin the following:

1) How thoroughly did the mccain camp vet you?

2) Why would you accept the vp offer if your daughter was 5 months pregnant? Not that her being pregnant at 17 is a problem in my book – but, does the whole world need to know about it? Is that really fair to your daughter?

3) You just had a baby with a disability, why are you even considering becoming the next president of the United States? Yes, sarah, I said president since mccain’s age/deteriorating state of health means he definitely isn’t living out the next 4 years.

4) Per the rumor that you recently applied for your first passport when visiting Iraq, have you seriously never traveled outside of North America? This is an unfounded rumor, correct?

5) Why are Alaskan politics so shady/weird? Also…

6) In your own words, can you describe TrooperGate? Can you describe what it means to be for – but then adamantly against – “The Bridge to Nowhere” once you were selected as vp? Lastly, how about all those earmarks for podunk Wasilla, Alaska?

7) Will you make it long enough on the ticket to give your speech Wednesday?

8 ) What and the hell were you thinking – if you’re actually the mother of trig – during your most recent labor? If you need help remembering the ridiculous culmination of events that lead up to the delivery of your premature baby with special needs, click the image below. Once the page loads, left click on the image once if it looks blurry.

One can only hope!