“Atkins Diet” + a 3 Hour All You Can Drink Party = Nightmarish Hell (I Think)

I don’t read much and I hate history, so, I’m sure adage exists that states: “A day without a lesson learned is a wasted day” or some equivalent. FDR, Churchill, Lincoln, Kennedy, Obama, etc. had to have said something in this manner.

Regardless, along with…



…I have (recently – last night) learned you should not consume the amount of alcohol you normally consume during a 3 hour all you can drink party if you’ve…

a) not been drinking as much as you normally do because of the vico/valium tag team – see racquetball post.

b) been trying to cut a quick 20 pounds in 14 days (wrestling style) using an unhealthy variation of the Atkins Diet.

Specifically, I’ve only been eating every imaginable meat, cheeses, nuts, and salads.  While I don’t really remember how I got home AND forgot to say goodbye to anyone (including my wife and the person the party was being thrown for) I have lost 9 pounds in 7 days and vodka and soda water with a slice of orange isn’t half bad. Hey now!

So, Ericka – I had a great time at your party. Sorry for bailing. Have fun during your summer adventures in Oklahoma. Whoops – thanks for the correction – I mean Kansas. My bad.

Welcome to the good life

P.S. – I am well aware that the above picture could possibly land me on Hot Chicks with Douchbags. It’s worth noting, I think/hope we were posing like this to mock those that wear sunglasses indoors at night though I don’t really remember what prompted the photo op. errrrrr.

P.S.S. – Last night, I somehow lost (imagine that) the grossly huge and green Tom Ford glasses seen above. Thus, they won’t be making another appearance.  John, I feel your disappointment 300 miles away.

3 thoughts on ““Atkins Diet” + a 3 Hour All You Can Drink Party = Nightmarish Hell (I Think)

  1. As the “hot chick” mentioned in the above photo, I will confirm that we were in fact mocking those that wear sunglasses indoors, at night. Rest at ease.

  2. Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Retrace yours steps from that night and find those f*cking glasses. WTF is the DJ supposed to wear at my bachelor party?

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